Greasy Fingerprints of Guilt

Admin Gal has an issue with organizations that will not trust the committees to complete the tasks they are assigned.

Projects can not be group managed.  The failure rate is 99.99% when this happens.  An excellent example is a newsletter.  Yes, content can be produced from the organization at large.  When it comes to the actual assembly and coordination of said newsletter, let the assignee's do their job.

Who shoulders the blame when everything goes to pot?  The original group who was assigned the task, that's who.  But the greasy fingerprints of the guilty, meddlesome creatures who couldn't help themselves, will be emblazoned on the smoldering heap of the failure.

Admin Gal's conclusion is - if you can't let go, don't assign the job.

Experiencing Technical Difficulties

Admin Gal walked into the office yesterday morning to find that not a phone in the building worked, the software program that ran her business unit has been taken hostage by gremlins and Monday has officially crapped all over Tuesday.

Spending the entire day sending email after email as to why the telephone system has the attention span of a gnat, the internet is as loyal as a cat and various programs have become recalcitrant has become maddening.

Here is the plain and simple truth.  Admin Gal did not break any of the following:

1. The phone system.
2. The internet.
3. The software.

Yes, she has called all the appropriate agencies to fix the problems.  No, hovering will only annoy her.

If you ask Admin Gal again 'Is it fixed yet?', no court in the land will convict her for the wrath she will bring down upon your head.

Have a nice day.

Everybody is Important...

in their own mind.  

As an Admin there is a hierarchy of people in my life.  Numero Uno?  My boss.  When he says he is free, he is free.  When he says piss off to a persistent client, I translate it to a more palatable 'He is busy, we'll get back to you with a more convenient time.'

Everyone has something that is earth shatteringly important.  One of the few things that trumps my boss is his boss. And that is understandable.  

But a consultant we've done business with, who only wants to pitch a new venture is at the bottom of the heap.  Especially when he's been told that my boss's plate is over flowing with high priority things.  

Will they never learn?

Supply Management

Admin Gal doesn't mean to complain -- actually she does.  In her office, she has had a vast influx of new consultants from far off lands who apparently do not understand that office supplies are not to be hoarded, taken home or used frivolously.

Seriously, how many pens can one person use in a month?  Or pads of paper?  Or correction tape?

The sad reality is that the office supplies are dwindling faster than they ought too.  Admin Gal's trust has been sorely abused.  She is going to have to lock the supply cabinet and be put out as every Tom, Harry and Sanjay comes to her desk to beg for a pen or pencil.  I do not want this.  But if this is the only way I can manage the office supplies, so be it.

Crime Alert

This morning, Admin Gal walked into her cubicle to find that her gel mouse wrist rest had been murdered.

The murder weapon lay in plain sight on the floor.  A blue tack.

Method of Death?  A hundred holes poked into the loyal defenseless wrist rest.

Time of Death? Sometime around midnight.

Suspects?  Obviously someone who does not understand Admin Gal's wrath.

The wrist rest was fine when Admin Gal left the office at 5pm on the dot last night.  There are only a few people it can be.  Words will be had.

Funeral services for the loyal wrist rest to be announced

Squatters have no Rights!

Admin Gal has friends in many organizations across the land.  A common hew and cry is the presumptive use of conference rooms.

Conference rooms are a carefully scheduled resource designed to be used for the entire organization.  When one person decides to coop one without a care to the schedule or the others who have reserved the resource, well things can get ugly.

It takes an Admin of exception constitution to wade in and sort through this matter.  Sometimes we are dealing with people way beyond our pay grade.  But rules are rules.  Often times they are rules they set.  People can't just set aside rules willy-nilly because it suits.  Anarchy would reign!

Admin Gal will not have anarchy in her office that she does not cause herself!

So, conference room squatters beware.  Should you choose to lay claim to a resource that is not yours, hoping to invoke the 'possession is 9/10' and all that.  Just know that you will be summarily shuffled out of your room so that the original meeting may be held at its scheduled time.

If you choose to protest...might I remind you that as a squatter, you have no rights.

Don't You Know Who I Am?

Admin Gal must give a shout out to a friend in the west.  She is faced with many of the same dilemma's, and handles them with much grace.  In particular, her latest post is a delight with Things You Say That Will Make Me Doubt You.


Her last point in particular struck a nerve, “You don’t understand, you are going to do what I tell you.  Don’t you know who I am?”  


Unfortunately, I could relate to that poorly worded demand.  My response is pretty standard, "Actually, no, I don’t know who you are. I know all the important people by name and sight."  All the while smiling sweetly or having a sweet tone in my voice if the person is on the phone uttering such an unfortunate statement.


My internal meter for lying is pretty accurate.  When someone is pushing the 'Don't you know who I am?' card, it generally means they have absolutely nothing to back themselves up with and are blow hards. 


Now, if said individuals had asked politely for assistance.  Explaining the situation and the urgency to them, allowing for some give and take, nine times out of ten they would find that the aid/information/meetings they were trying to bully themselves into would be given freely or opportunities for other options would be opened up to them.


Instead - they are dead in the water.  Shark bait.

It must be hard for people to be important in the small land of their imagination.

A PSA on Behalf of the Admins...

When trying to get the attention of any given Administrative Assistant, you need to only ring the telephone or instant message or email them. Not in any particular order.

NOT ALL AT ONCE!

Really people.  Is it necessary to demonstrate your attention deficit issues by by using every single method of communication you have at your disposal to get our attention?  We know you exist.  Unless you are the person who signs our paycheck, you will have to get in line and wait your turn with the others.

Waiting 30 seconds is not an acceptable wait time.  Try 30 minutes.  If its not bleeding or an ambulance doesn't need to be called, it can generally wait.

Thus concludes our Administrative Public Service Announcement.

Have a Nice Day.

Give A Gal A Bone

Admin Gal feels like a dog with a bone and ten toys, guarding her stash.

I walk a fine line with my resources so that the business needs may be met by the employees in her care while working with the consultants that are in the midst of the company transition.

Frankly I’m exhausted!

Help me do the math.  200 employees, 5 functioning conference rooms, 20-30 meetings on any given day.  Add to this volatile mix, consultants who are doing data transfers who require quiet places to hold hour plus long conference calls at indeterminate times.  The math doesn’t work!

There are no guarantees that I can get the consultants a conference room, so they are in cubes conducting these calls on speakerphone.  Things are tense already.

I’d say give the Admin Gal a bone, but right now I’m guarding my stash and won’t come out of my hole.

So, giving me another bone to guard might not be a great idea when I'm ready to snap.

Politics at Work

Politics & Religion should always be discussed with great sensitivity and tolerance.  There is nothing that is a bigger hot button topic.

But I have a bit of a pet peeve.  It's one thing when the company you work for encourages you to 'do your civic duty and get out there to vote'. It's another when they direct you specifically to do certain actions regarding bills in process. Up to and including form letters and scripts to Congress people and Senators.  These letters do not offer a choice of opinion, but a specific view point that supports the political views of the company.

I get it.  I can make a difference.  The point is 'I' can make the difference.  I have the backing of the Constitution & the Bill of Rights to vote my conscience.  Not be a political lackey for the company I work for.


For a minimum of 2,080 hours out of a year, thats 8,760 hours, I give my employer my full attention.  Often it is much more than that.  That time does not give them the right to influence my political view point.


I'm willing to have a civil discussion about politics and religion with people I trust to respond in kind.  But I won't allow my self to be used to further the political agenda of a corporation.

Timeliness is Next to...

If a contractor says they are going to be doing work at 1:30 pm, knowing full well that the people they need to see are leaving at 2 pm.

DO NOT Show up 15 minutes past the deadline thinking that all will be well. It won't be.  You will have a very cranky, non-cooperative  individual on your hands.  Whose time has been wasted.

Just because as a corporation we choose to pay extreme amounts of money to be told how to manage ourselves, a little courtesy goes a long way.  Makes the sting of cutting those very large checks less painful.  So, respecting the various calendars, appointments and just the individuals time is a sign of respect.  When a consultant stops extending those common courtesies, well contracts can be broken.

If you set a time, stick to it.  It makes a better impression and the world a brighter place.

Idle Chatter

Every office has one.  You know the person.  The one who can't be quiet. Who has to fill a void that doesn't exist with noise.  Standing in the cube aisle making idle conversation, annoying those around them. The one who makes chit-chat.

Chit-chat in and of itself is benign.  Something to be done when nothing else is to be done.  However, when you have a person in the office with apparently nothing else to do but chit-chat among others who have actual duties to perform, the effects can be devastating on productivity and moral.
That aimless person, unless managed effectively, curtails the productivity of others.  Sowing seeds of resentment in their wake. They seldom recognize boundaries, leaving the person they are bothering to be blunt.

Times are tough.  Everyone should be putting their shoulder to the wheel, showing their value to their employer regardless of the state of the company.  If your company is in the midst of downsizing, your work ethic will be recognized by recommendations after the job has been eliminated.  If you are lucky enough to be in a company that is stable, you will likely to be around for another day.

The old adage 'idle hands are the devils workshop' hold true in this day and age.  Idle chit-chat brings nothing but problems.

How RUDE!

Earning an income is a simple equation:
Work x Application = Income
This isn't rocket science (unless of course you are a rocket scientist, then it's a whole other ball of wax).
Admin Gal has an ax to grind with Sales People.
Admin Gal gets the fact that sales people need to make a living.  If they are respectful of her, she will do what she can to get them to the right people to open a dialog.  No, sales people do NOT need to speak to the top of the totem pole at the first swing.  Let me get you to the correct person.
DO NOT call incessantly hoping, beyond hope, to catch Admin Gal's boss on the phone when she is 'off duty'.  It isn't going to happen.

A - Admin Gal's boss won't pick up a number he doesn't recognize.

B - Breathing heavy then hanging up is just plain RUDE.

C - Just do what Admin Gal has asked you to do.

Dress Code or How Not to Dress Like a Pop Tart

The summer has drawn to a close.  People have once more started covering their bodies with more layers of clothing in order to accommodate the wildly fluctuating temperatures of the fall.  HOWEVER...
That doesn't mean that some people do not try to keep summer alive.  The sad, sad truth is that companies need to put forth some sort of dress codes. If only to educate the clueless.
This summer my eyes have been assaulted with cleavage baring tops on people where more fabric is a necessity not a fashion statement.  Skirts that with a stiff wind or an inappropriate bend the world would be privy to their privates.  More knarly, sparkly flip-flops that were stinky bio-hazards that did not belong in a corporate environment.  All of the above a direct violation of the company's dress code.

People.  I am not the fashion police.  I'm sure that people look at me and say I could desperately use a make over.  But when I leave the house in the morning, I know that no fashion catastophe will happen.  All my bits and parts will stay properly covered and never see the light of day so that my co-workers will wish never had happened.

The advice of a good friend follows :   Folks – put a mirror in your foyer – one last look before you leave for work, doesn’t hurt.  If you have to question to yourself whether or not something is appropriate, it probably isn’t!

Top Ten Reasons I will NOT Own a Blackberry or ANY Device of Its Ilk

1. The keys are only useful for a Lilliputian.
   
2. The calendar sync is moody, unpredictable and spiteful
   
3. Emails get lost, only to show up hours, days, and weeks later.
   
4. Answering email while at the dinner table is just wrong.
   
5. People can NOT walk a straight line and text while using a Blackberry.
   
6. Blackberry users think we really don’t know they are on the golf course.
   
7. evryn frgts bsc englh & grmr sklz once hkd on the crkbry
   
8. A vibrating Blackberry on a desk sounds like a demented swarm of hornets.
   
9. People do NOT look more important with a crackberry or iAnnoyance stuck to their ear.
   
10. Using the Blackberry while on the toilet is not considered efficient or socially acceptable.